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June 17, 2022

This Week In Amusing Charismania - Screenshot Irony & Chuck Pierce Drops Acid

By Anthony Wade

Well, I tried to close the week with some humor but...


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And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. Their end will correspond to their deeds. - 2Corinthians 11: 14-15 (ESV)

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I was perusing Charisma News this morning because, well, so you don't have to. There was so much serious going on this week that it just seemed weighty. I was wondering what bit of heresy or NAR dominionist blather I would be contending with when I looked away from my computer screen momentarily. When my eyes returned their gaze to the screen the juxtaposed screen shot made me chuckle to the point I thought I would share it with you. It is the picture for this devotional on my website. These are the top five stories on Charisma News this morning and it is a microcosm of why Charismania is so off the rails and why no one takes the church serious anymore. The bottom left is the same every day. It is a link to the daily Strang Report, named after the founder and CEO of Charisma, Stephen Strang. Mr. Strang is a rabid dominionist who uses his platform to try and convince Christians and churched folk everywhere to vote Republican. The advertisement to the right of this is for the con man, Jonathan Con and his latest con-job, "The Harbingers of Things To Come." Cahn is an even more rabid dominionist than Strang as he teaches that America is under covenant with God, which it most certainly Is not. Replacement theology aside, it is mildly amusing that this advertisement is apparently a month out of date as it proclaims this will only be in theaters on May 12th and 19th!

The more amusing part of the screenshot was above these two items. There were three stories linked above. The one on the left declared prophetically, "Get on your shoes for a season of acceleration." Despite the poor English, as it should have read "Get your shoes on", here was the prophetic "onesie" for the day! God is apparently going to accelerate everyone! Or everyone who reads Charisma News. Or maybe everyone who puts their shoes on. Either way, the "prophet" describes God showing him a deflated balloon and audibly telling him to get ready for a second wind because there is a hyperinflation of my Spirit coming to the church. Yes, beloved we all remember with childhood wonder the balloon animal portion of the Sermon on the Mount, don't we? This is an absurd false prophecy, designed to scratch itching ears. Sure, we all want a hyperinflation of the spirit of God to come to our church but why did God remove His spirit to begin with? What did the church do to deserve this second wind?

On the far right is the second absurdity - the orphan spirit! Beware the orphan spirit! Learn how you can destroy this made up spirit in your life too! We all remember when Peter was casting our orphan spirits in the Book of Acts, don't we? The funnier thing is when googling orphan spirit there were multiple links and stories from the four corners of Charismania. Who knew? Now, the article inside tells of a harrowing story that a woman had gone through early in life facing homelessness. Certainly not making fun of the adversity she faced and overcame. I am just saying that it is not an "orphan spirit." Charismania has a habit of over-spiritualizing everything and seeing a demon behind every bush. Sometimes a bush is a bush. Sometimes a challenge is just life. By spiritualizing our failings or problems, we externalize them and find another source to blame. We are not victims of happenstance or spiritual warfare all of the time. If I find myself weighing too much it is not because of a "Twinkie Spirit." It probably means I have eaten too much. Needing deliverance from cupcakes is not really a spiritual matter. Sure we can pray for better resistance to what trips us up and fast and pray for help when temptation comes but just because I understand that everyone in the church is not meant to filthy rich - that does not mean I suffer from a poverty spirit!

Now, the part that made me chuckle about these two articles is the one that sat in the middle of them declaring - "How the Bible Teaches Us to Discover Truth." Now I agree of course that the bible is absolute truth but the fact that this title sat in between the Orphan Spirit and the Acceleration Prophecy I just found amusing on many different levels. Then I clicked on it and discovered it was written be renowned false teacher, Mark Virkler. It was then I realized that even in my pause for amusement, there was still heresy to correct. It appears that Virkler's point here was not to establish the bible as absolute truth but rather to promote the Bethel teaching that relationship is better than scripture. I am just going to highlight two horrendous portions of this article:

"The Pharisees thought they would establish the truth by studying the Scriptures. Jesus rebuked them and said they needed to actually come to Him to receive the truth (John 5:39-40). Truth is not a book. Truth is a person (John 14:6). "Revelation encounters" change our theology (i.e., our understanding of the words of Scripture)." - Mark Virkler

This is so bad but realize this garbage is taught in many Bethelite churches across this country. If you read John 5, you will see that Jesus rebuked the Pharisees because they claimed to establish truth through scriptures but failed to see how all of the scripture pointed to Him! He is the word! Read the first chapter of John! Virkler uses this to say Jesus is somehow bad-mouthing scripture and that the Pharisees just needed to "come to Him." What utter blasphemy. John 10 is simply Jesus saying that none come to the Father except through Him. That to believe in the father you must first have faith in Him. There is NOTHING here about truth not being a book and Virkler's trivializing of scripture is biblically criminal here. He is right though on the last point. If you think you are getting revelations, they can change your theology. But should they? Why would God give you any revelation above or different than what is already in His final revealed word? The answer is He wouldn't. Then who is providing the revelations? Read the key verses for today. Even the devil himself disguises as an angel of light. In the 1800's a man in upstate New York claimed an angel gave him special revelation on golden tablets that represented a "new gospel." Joseph Smith parlayed that baloney into Mormonism, which will lead untold millions of people to hell because they did not trust the truth of the bible that says even if an angel should give you a different gospel mark them as accursed! Keep your revelation encounters Mark. I will stick to the truth of scripture. The second portion to look at from this article is this nugget:

"I either love the security of my theological box or I love the prophetic word constantly emerging in my heart, granting me ever-increasing light, continually transforming me into His likeness." - Mark Virkler

And here lies the heart of the heresy of Bethel Church and so many more throughout the NAR led apostate church. This is the basis for experiential Christianity that seeks to marginalize scripture and replace it with what we experience in our ever wickedly deceitful hearts. Look at the choice as Virkler lays it out. You can choose a theological box, otherwise known as the bible, or the words that constantly emerge in our hearts. What makes them "prophetic?" Absolutely nothing. The assumption made by Virkler is that if it pops into your heart then it must be a word from God that is not only equal to scripture but now should be considered ahead of His word! How dangerous and frightening. So, while the positioning of these articles was amusing at first maybe God used it for me to open the Virkler abomination. Must be that comedic spirit at work again.

Ok, that was a joke. Now onto Chuck Pierce who appears to have dropped acid according to the above linked article. Well, that was just me poking fun at his latest false prophecy. Remember Virkler's beliefs? Pierce shares them. Why be bound by the theological box of the bible when you can go for a ride on the prosperity root!

"While praying in tongues before a service, Chuck Pierce saw an angel come down to earth with a key. The angel fit the key into the ground, then said, "Get ready for a root ride." Right after the angel spoke, roots started exploding out of the ground. Pierce says that the roots started moving underneath him and the rest of the congregation, but he explains that the roots were not just ordinary roots. The roots were made of words. "Now, I didn't plan to do any of this, so don't ask me what it means. That is not my job tonight," Pierce said. "My job is just to tell you what's about to come up by your legs and start moving." Pierce continues, "Either it's going to catch you or you're going to have to catch it." He says that the roots came from five layers down, which he assumes means five centuries. And the first word on them was "prosperity." "All of a sudden it came out and it went up, up between some of you," Pierce says. "Some of you need to say, 'I want to ride that root out.'" Pierce says that prosperity is about to move like it hasn't been able to in the last five centuries." - Charisma News

A move of prosperity we have not seen in the last five centuries? Was 1522 a bountiful year for the followers of Christ? Or maybe it just means it will be fast like the acceleration prophet guy? This is all very confusing. So, in the middle of a service, Chuck Pierce started hallucinating in the Lord and saw roots that were really words. I hate when that happens. The first word was prosperity because any false prophecy worth its salt starts with money for the marks in the congregation. He then declares that some of those present need to state that they want to ride that root out. Seriously? Were there some in attendance who thought they had prospered enough? No need to ride the root out? Three of the last four words were revolution, liberation and captivity breakout. Pierce is so good at his craft. The second rule of a good false prophecy is it must be so vague as to be applicable to almost anyone. Liberation? Breaking out from captivity? Revolution? That must tug on the spiritual heartstrings of nearly all who had gathered. Of course, the bible speaks to prosperity, breakouts from captivity revolution and liberation. In order for this to be accurate you would have to believe that God forgot to add these revelations when He wrote the scriptures and somehow forgot about it for thousands of years until He now wants to use Chuck Pierce to inform His people. Hmm"I think I will trust scripture.

That is really the message today from God. The theological box He left for us is all we need. It is Jesus according to John. We do not need extra-biblical revelation because it did not come from God. We do not need to be riding roots, fighting orphan spirits, or putting on running shoes for our season of acceleration. We do not need Jonathan Con selling us on new harbingers and false covenants. We do not need the false god of Stephen Strang's dominionism. We do however need to laugh. It is good medicine for the soul.

So, no apologies to Chuck for the acid joke. Hey, ya got a problem? Take it up with the sarcastic satirical spirit I have been fighting my whole life"

Reverend Anthony Wade - June 17, 2022

Authors Bio:
Credentialed Minister of the Gospel for the Assemblies of God. Owner and founder of 828 ministries. Vice President for Goodwill Industries. Always remember that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.